Midseason Form-Unfortunately

When I started writing The Packers Literary Corner a year ago, one of my questions was, is there really enough absurd, even idiotic media coverage about the Packers in the offseason for me to do a weekly blog poking fun at it?

Silly me.

In the last few days I could have done an hourly blog, what with all the rich comedic material provided by the NFL scribblers and TV chatterers, on the subject of Brett Favre’s comments about the Packers not trading for Randy Moss. Offseason? What offseason? Some of these media numbskulls are in midseason form and it’s only May.

We don’t need a show titled CSI-Lambeau to get the facts of this simple case:

--Brett thought having another talented veteran receiver on board would make the offense run more efficiently. 99% of Packer fans agree with this.

--Brett has a burning desire to win here and now in 2007, not in some distant time and galaxy far, far away. 99% of Packer fans agree with this.

--Brett gets so frustrated with not winning that he can hardly contain himself and at times he might not choose his words as carefully as he should. 99% percent of Packer fans share that frustration, and express themselves far more colorfully than Brett did. At my house, we have had to replace a considerable amount of glassware.

If you’re a division manager of a large company, and you are given a sales target to hit, and then your boss refuses to give you the resources you absolutely need to hit that target, year after year—and you’re the one who takes the blame—then you’d be just as angry as Brett apparently got. You might even say, to hell with this job; I’ll go work somewhere else, where top management isn’t so tight with a buck.

So what’s the problem? With some of these sports “journalists” the problem seems to be, their boss gave them a word quota for that day, and they have absolutely nothing to say, so they end up producing excreta like the following, from the word processor of Adam Schein of Fox Sports.com. It can be smelled in its entirety at: http://msn.foxsports.com/nfl/story/6810106

He starts off with the headline: “Packers Better Off Without Favre”

What’s wrong with that headline? Everything but the spelling. This is, flat out, one of the stupidest things I have ever read about the Packers.

First of all, how can an organization be better off without the most effective leader it has ever had, a leader who clearly still performs at a high level? It boggles the mind that anyone could say that. But making sense is not a prerequisite for employment in the major media.

But this little fellow is just getting started. He goes on: “Favre continuously popping off on management about not surrounding him with adequate talent, indirectly ripping his teammates, is a distraction and a detriment. So are the constant questions about his retirement.”

Bad writing here, folks. First of all, popping off means: “to speak in a burst of vehement anger.” That doesn’t sound like the way our soft spoken Southern quarterback sounds. It sounds more like, well, the way Adam Schein makes his living, which is why I wouldn’t waste much time listening to him on TV or radio.

How about the “indirectly ripping his teammates” part? That’s simply wrong. Brett has had to demonstrate tremendous self-control throughout his career, when baited by reporters to comment on the poor play of his teammates. Other star NFL players have not been so gracious.
Their initials might be: T.O.

Schein continues: “…is a distraction and a detriment. So are the constant questions about his retirement.”
This is funny. The same media that constantly pesters Brett with questions about his retirement from the moment he arrives at training camp in July, now says that by patiently standing there and answering their bonehead questions, he is causing a distraction and a detriment. Strange logic.

Before we assign a letter grade to this article, let’s show one more example of why it seems odd they make you take a test in order to operate a motor vehicle, but they turn virtually anyone loose on the airwaves:

Schein says, “Let Favre go play for the Dolphins or Jaguars.”

Here, he demonstrates a fundamental lack of understanding about the Green Bay Packers. The team is owned by over 100,000 loyal fans across the country, and we don’t want Brett playing anywhere but for us. Ever.

And Brett doesn’t want to play anywhere else, either. There was never any doubt.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today’s Packers Literary Corner Grade for Adam Schein’s work
posted on FoxSports.com May 14:

Fluidity of Prose: D
Knowledge of Subject Matter: C-
Logic: F
Usefulness to Packer Fans: F-
Overall Grade: D-